My thoughts runs faster than light. Thousands of these words form from a word. And every word i hear brings conversation to those characters. It is like eavesdropping but not really. It's like watching a movie but not really seeing the moving images but just listening.
There are times that anxiety visits my thoughts, scrumbling those careful words that i have formed and string together. There are times that fear is prominent than clamness and the struggle to clam my inner storms is harder. There are times that the struggle is too hard that it leaves my body shaking and i feel the world is spinning.
With all the internal storms that came photography is the only anchor that keep me sane. It calms my soul, brings me hope and reminding me of the beautiful things i have seen.
It is the reminder that even in a storms there is beauty. Even in it's violent path there is grace. Photography reminds me of all the juxtaposition of everything around me. The contrass of black and white, the shapes and lines, order and chaos.
I write, then i don't and i write again. It's the dance that i find myself everyday. To give in or not to those words that my thoughts whispers. To run my fingers across the keyboard and let my soul take over.
In the mids of these battle there is that one clarity — my photographs. It is not a dance but a certainty. It is my voice— my real voice. Not just a thought but what i truly am.
Inner battle exist not only by a form of anxiety and panic but with every doubt that inhibits us to become who we truly are. It lives within us and it grows with us but it's up to us if we give in to it.
The more battles, the more i see clarity. In every storm there is grace and beauty.
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