yo-yo for a day

i bought a yo-yo yesterday. i have no idea why but i just did. weird ah? yeah sometime i just do some weird staffs… hehehehe but come to think of it i was just like throwing money. if nanay find out about this then i am in trouble.

i felt bad about buying useless things. i mean come to think of it, many people in the world are starving to death and i'm here buying useless things. nanay teach me not to wast money, that we should live in a simple way. i can always remember her lines "simpleng pamumuhay, puspusang pakikibaka" (simple way of life, thorough strugle).

lubas pics

pic sa lubas.... from the left holding a scissor wearing black shirt me, wearing red shirt inday rechelle, then on pink stripe ate kaira, on white is mama roxane, then on red is ROWENA CARRANZA-PARAAN Director, National Union of Journalists of the PhilippinesAssociate Editor, Philippine Graphic magazine, Managing Editor, Bulatlat.com, nanay pypai on blue, and last tiya karen on darker red.

wish it will all be gone

i wish it will all be gone by morning. the same pain i have to live up every day. dark clouds that formed over our heads for the past week and five days. it is one of the most darkest days of our lives. emotionally it leaves my body powerless and eventually turns to death. inside my head, it tells me that i should be strong for little Ghe-ghe. but some times when i'm alone i feel the pain, the great pain and it scares me that may not have the strength to battle this problems. yes i am weak, i'm not like nanay or tiya… i'm just Ian the mouse, the scared one.

Still the same

Its been a week and four days when they broke up. My heart still in grief, and pain seems to stay forever. Its just like a bad dream and I just wish that I will be awaken from all of this. I love them both and don't want to choose from either of them. My love for them is equal. In the darkness I cry, when I'm alone I feel the great pain of loosing two people you love and you will love forever. In the morning I just wish that this is over that things will come back to normal, that they will be back in each others arms. nanay said to me that the door for reconciliation is not yet close, that there is still hope for the two of them. Hope I am brave enough to tell them how I feel and it hurt us all specially if ghe-ghe will find out about it. I know she too will take it the hard way. I don't want to tell her I don't want her to get hurt, I hope that she didn't find out the news. I love her too, and I don't want her to feel the pain that I am feeling. Its hard and I don't think she will be able to take it.

empi

in this world where capitalism is god, where poor people suffers til death. you still say to me that i should keep my head down and pretend that there is peace. well i did, i did bow to them... to the gods. i even worship them just to survive... to keep my self alive. i offer them gold and all my possession, i even became their slave. but the sad part is, in the end of the day i lay on the ground lifeless.